Picture this…. 5:30 on a Saturday morning, tucked up in bed with no need or desire to move for the next couple of hours. A sleep in, enjoy it, don’t feel guilty, just do it… anddddd the phone rings -------- REALITIES CALLING!!!
Dang cattle have grown fingers and unhooked the dog clip on one of the pens and they’ve been raving throughout the open paddocks all night having a ripsnorta’ of a time. Paddocks which coincidently are VERY open thanks to the development of new pens being built and fences being pulled down left right and centre.
“Copy, carry on with your health checks and Ill poke down and give you a hand once I get my life together here, won’t be long”.
Time for a coffee? Nah… get tidied up, grab that red dog (very little help but likes to think so) and let’s get to moving some cattle in the fresh morning light. Not the worst way to start the day.
Reality punches you in the face again WHACK – just as you arrive down to the yards the tail end of the cattle is being followed into the laneway. Jobs right.
WRONG! If you can call at 5:30 in the morning and ask for help you can sure as shit call back half an hour later and say you’ve got unexpected help and you’ll manage!!! COMMUNICATION and consideration!!! Simple as that.
The wheels on the bike skid in a pathetic display of your minor tantrum and you head for home. The dog gets yelled at because it poops in the yard when it could have easily gone outside, the door gets slammed and scares the cat and a mostly pointless/ smart-alec snapchat describing your frustrations gets sent to a small number of friends that will understand the situation and respond accordingly telling you things to make you feel better and boost your ego. *cue REALITY check again! Always manages to show up just when you need to be slapped with a little perspective. Shake it off and let’s see what we can learn here…
A snapchat is returned with a picture of a dressing gown clad girlfriend being comforted by a cat sitting on her deck on a misty southern morning in the cold country, white-knuckle around a cup of strong black coffee. This my friends, is the picture-perfect image of what us females can label ‘meltdown mode’. Our perfectly imperfect, crazy cat lady, hormonal roller-coaster, numerous personalities, cocobananas, overreactive female meltdown mode. Strap yourselves in because this girl is going to blow!
The text states ‘I blew up a tractor list night, my life is spiralling, I’m ready to run’. (she’s a runner, and I get this, I’m a runner too. It’s a good feeling, it’s a great option, the horizon is always calling and after time the bags pack themselves when the call cries loudly enough).
Funnily enough, my minor tantrum has passed and the mouth fire wanting to spray all over someone is just a charred smoky mess. This friend has just inadvertently offered me some perspective and now it’s time for me to subtly return the favour.
This friend is privileged; she is young, healthy, intelligent and beautiful with a big supportive family, acres of good grassy country with handy rainfall and hasn’t been affected by fires. She has numerous horses to work and a passion for doing it right, pet dogs and work dogs to help her through life and move her cows while she’s busy cussing at them. A beautiful home, a good professional reputation which allows her to choose her contracts, name a price and work when she wants to. A supportive and grounding partner who loves all her personalities and an abundance of friends from all walks of live. Privileged, deservingly and humbly privileged.
I did not alert her to all of these things because fuelling her fire right now with reality rather than support would melt the phone in my hands. In all my glorious wisdom (with a very clear understanding that I, like most people, know the answer but am unable to apply it to my own life) suggested that she-
“take the day to feed this meltdown, then pull your socks up and get back to it; ride a horse, cuss at some cows, spend time with a friend, drink beer and watch the sunset looking out over your country, get perspective, and be kind to yourself... and for goodness sake take that god-awful dressing gown off!
Failing this, let me know when you start running and I’ll be right there beside you sista’, where we headed this time?!”
Her response was a humbling thank you. Followed by “you should write these things down, because when perspective escapes me, the mind can get rather dark… I need to be able to be reminded”.
So, it turns out my day has started pretty darn well. I’ve learnt a lesson, I’ve helped a friend, I’ve turned my brain on for the day and I’m feeling good for it. Thank you to the staff member that initiated my tantrum and subsequently helped me learn something and do a friend a solid. Every situation can be something learnt.
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
When you’re losing control, gain it back by helping someone else.
Find perspective, no matter how hard you have to look.
Realise how privileged you are to have the life you have with cows and horses and dogs and friends and family.
Feeling privileged will make you privileged.
Be a crazy cat lady when you need to be, because that is real and being real is authentic and authenticity is blessed.